cff IS THE GRASS REALLY GREENER? | Simple and Serene Living

IS THE GRASS REALLY GREENER?

Friday, March 24, 2017

The other day while visiting some of my favorite blogs, I read a post by Rue of An Old-Fashioned World that really struck a chord with me. 

Rue was talking about the importance of just being herself. 


The reason it really struck a chord is because I have been feeling a bit down. For the last year I have been very erratic about posting on my blog. To be honest I wasn't sure whether or not I wanted to carry on with it. 

It's not that I don't like blogging, and I certainly love the friends I have made, but I have just felt that my life is off track. When your life is off track it is hard to find your focus. 


I have been wondering if the grass is really greener on the other side. 

Here's the thing. I love the apartment I moved into almost a year ago. (yes, it has really been that long) I was so happy to finally have a place of my own, and I am still loving coming home, shutting the door, and knowing that it is mine. 

 
However, I miss my family. My daughters and grandchildren live in Atlanta. It is a long drive, I feel like it is a burden for me to stay with them, and my car is 18 years old. 

There is also the fact that my older sister upped and moved to Arizona a month ago, without warning, to live with my younger sister. They left me with the sole responsibility of my mother. 

So here is the thing. I feel like it is time for me to focus on what I want. On just being me. On writing what I want. On doing what I want. On living where I want. 


Everyone else is doing those things. My mom loves living here and says she will never leave. I however, really don't want to stay. I have a very difficult time getting through the winters. 

Do I know exactly what I want? No, but I want to spend some time deciding. I am 66 years old and economically challenged so that limits my choices. However, I have put my name on a waiting list for an apartment in Atlanta. It will be 18 months to two years before I can get in so that will give me time to prepare. 


I am also researching places in Arizona in case I decide I want to move there. 

Is the grass really greener on the other side? I don't know. What I do know is that life is getting shorter and I want to spend it how and with whom I want. 
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P.S. I promised to share my healthy eating plan and I will do that next week

Comments

  1. Laura, I know how you feel. I am living near my daughter and Grands but I miss my other daughter so much. Still I think I've made the right decision for myself. Now that my Mom is here and I'm her caretaker I do have less time so it's important I spend it doing the things I love with people I love. You will make the right decisions for yourself! Hugs!

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    1. I am glad that you are happy, Linda. I know how much you love being near those grandchildren.

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  2. I know exactly how you feel, Laura. I spin my wheels sometimes doing things for everyone but myself. I feel like I put my life on a back-burner to please everyone else. Somedays it is okay--sometimes I feel 'strapped'. I do know that I want to go south to the ocean and that will come with a cost--the cost of leaving kids/grandkids for vacation time and holidays when we can get together. The kids are getting older and soon they won't need such a 'hands on' Nana...and while I will miss those 'babies' it will give me some time for ME, too. You and I are almost the same age...time is moving us along, isn't it? xo Diana

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    1. I think it is really hard to put ourselves first, Diana. I wish I could figure out what the right thing is to do for myself, but it is tough. I know you adore those grandchildren, but you are right when you say they are growing up and before we know it they will be leaving the nest too.

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  3. good for you to do the things in life that you want. Life is too short and so often people live out their lifes out of obligation and quilt and then it's too late. Sometimes it's hard to get to that 'Happy' but once you are there it's a wonderful place to be.

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    1. I know that I don'e want to wake up in twenty years and realize that I really am too old to do anything.

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  4. I am right there with you Laura. I am leaving this morning for a long journey from Chicago to Orlando to take care of my mom. I am the sole caregiver for my mom and now she is needing more care. So I have the task of pulling her away from her love of Florida and friends to move her closer up near us. She needs someone now in her life to take care of her. In the midst of all of this I am selling a home and trying to figure out our next move. So I totally get your wanting to just let go and do something for yourself. I think you will love being near your kids and grands. Life is short be happy. You go girl.
    xoxo
    Kris

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    1. You have so much going on in your life right now, Kris. I'm sure it will be difficult for your mom to leave Florida, but it will be much easier for you having her closer. I hope that your house sells quickly and that you and your husband get settled in a new home soon. Hugs.

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  5. Do what gives you peace and joy!

    FlowerLady

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    1. Thank you. Hopefully I will get it all figured out soon.

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  6. The whole Arizona idea kind of threw me. I hadn't heard you speak of it before, as it wouldn't bring you closer to your kids. However, you know that I have gone that route and it didn't work out so well. Those grandkids grow up fast and the kids always seem to have their own lives. But go where your heart takes you. You owe that to yourself!
    Brenda

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    1. Thanks, Brenda. Arizona is not my first choice, but I do need to be close to family and if my kids move from Atlanta I don't want to be stuck there.

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  7. I am also 66 and I just told someone the other day" I want to change up my life." I am working on it steadily. It seems somehow that even though I wanted to I have been living my life always for others. Now it is time to think of myself for awhile. If I don't love it out it goes. It cost to move all this stuff. Best of luck with the new choices you are making. Wish you the very best!


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    1. It is so nice to have this support her, Rita. Maybe 66 is a turning point for us, when we realize that life is getting shorter and we need to make changes now. I hope all of your changes work out for you, too.

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  8. It's a tough choice.. do we want to be closer to our siblings or our kids? Everyone does have their own life.. but at least if you are closer, you do have the option of taking a short drive to see your kids and grandkids. In the last few years, I'm living closer to one of my sisters which I really love.. we have gotten much well... closer! But now I'm further away from my other sister, and we used to be so so close.. and now we are more distant. I wish all of one family could ALL live in the same town! I have a son 5 hours away, and I would just as soon live closer to him. He's involved in HIS life, but at least if I live less than an hour away, I myself have the option to drive to see him. I'm getting older too (69) and it will be harder and less attractive to drive those long distances. I believe we need to end up living nearest the ones we want to share our life with the most! It's very hard when hubby doesn't share the same thoughts though! Our "younger" kids SHOULD be the ones who drive the distance to come see us.. but that doesn't usually happen! Go with what YOU really want to do and feel better with. It's too bad you have to wait so long for a move to Atlanta though... once I made up my mind, I would be so anxious to go!

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    1. I wish that I could go now, Marilyn, but with my limited income I have to wait for senior housing. I miss the days when families lived closer, too. It is hard when they are all spread out.

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    2. I wish you lived close by so that I could give you a big hug, and invite you to spend the afternoon with me. First of all, where ever you decide to make your home, I know it will be lovely. I also think it's time for you to put your needs first for a change. My parents lived in Arizona for a number of years. It has many advantages, but is not for everyone. From what I know about you, I sense that you have an "old soul". You love vintage and traditional. Atlanta would give you that in spades, Arizona, not so much. I'm going out on a limb to make a suggestion ~ what about Savannah? It's a charming pace just oozing with historic charm and you would be in the same state as your grands. What fun they could have visiting you there. I don't know what the mileage is, but I am guessing it would be closer to Atlanta than you are now. Although you have your challenges, you also have the freedom to choose where you want to be. Look carefully at the whole picture. In the meantime, keep blogging. Yours is a welcome and needed voice.

      Big Texas Hugs,
      Susan and Bentley

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  9. Forget Savannah. I just checked and the mileage is 250. Also, the crime rate is high. You need a safe community that's full of charm and where you will be really happy.

    Love,
    Susan and Bentley

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    1. Yes, unfortunately it is too far from any family. Thanks for your suggestions though, and I am giving you a virtual hug.

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  10. I think the two year window is really going to help you make up your mind. Life is full of surprises...some good...some bad. Until than enjoy what you do have! Ps your apartment is absolutely charming.

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    1. Thank you, Ronda. I am trying hard to live in the moment.

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  11. Hey Laura- I hope you figure it all out! Lately I have been thinking a similar thought about blogging and how it is a hobby, and once it becomes stressful with how much you are "supposed" to post or anything like that, and it is no longer fun, I would not want to do it anymore. Writing about what you want and what makes you feel good should definitely help you feel like your life is more "in focus."

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  12. Oh Laura... I'm happy my post struck a cord with you and you've decided to finally do what you want. Now if I could just stick to my own advice outside of blogging ;) No matter what you choose to do, as long as you're happy... that's all that matters and I wish you the best.

    I've never lived in Atlanta, but since I live here in Arizona, I will tell you it's my favorite state I have lived in. Of course, I don't live in the heat LOL But if you need advice or thoughts, I'm willing to help, my friend.

    (((hugs)))
    rue

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