move over this is my spot

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Sometimes I feel like there is a battle going on in blogland. It is a jockeying for position. A one upmanship. An I can do it better than you can.

Sometimes I just step back and wonder what all of the competition is about. But then I don't really like competition. It makes me feel anxious.

Competition is everywhere in our society. When we are young we compete for grades and to be picked first for team sports. As we get older we compete for the best college, the perfect spouse, and the best paying job.

We are often made to feel "less than". 

What is wrong with being second, or last, or not being picked at all. It is often that not being picked frees us to find what we really want in life, to go out on our own.

Maybe not being on that soft ball team is a good thing, because it makes us realize we really like to draw.

Maybe not getting into a top tier college lets us find a small school that has just the program we want and friends who have similar interests. 

Maybe the corporate world isn't the right fit for us, because we are a free spirit who would wither under all of those rules and regulations.

Yes, the blogging world is just like the rest of the world. There are those bloggers who are competing to be the best. To be picked first. To have the highest stats, the largest readership, the most comments. I applaud those bloggers, but I also applaud the bloggers who are just writing what they love. Who put themselves out there everyday to share their voice. 

When I first started blogging I was worried about my stats all of the time. I had no stats. Now I rarely check my stats. It isn't because I don't want people to read my blog. I hope they will, but I hope they do it because they like what I am writing. I hope they know that I consider them my friends. 

I follow and read blogs that I feel a connection with. They may be very large blogs or very small ones, but I feel that they are writing what they love. Their blogs are an extension of their personalities.

So, you don't have to move over for me. My spot is my own and there is plenty of space for you to sit right along side of me in your own spot.

P.S. I wrote the majority of this post last night, but when I woke up this morning, I started to read some of my favorite blogs. I found this post by Jen at Muddy Boot Dreams. She is writing about finding your blogging voice. As always, it is a very good read.



  1. I agree Laura completely! I write my blog for me and I'm thrilled that some people read it and connect with my thoughts and ideas but even if no one but me read it, I'd be ok with that. I never started it to be a "blogger " but rather to help me remember what happens in my life...the good, bad and the ugly because let's face it, the older I get the less I remember about my day to day life. I love your blog because it's about you!

  2. you certainly don't need to move over for me either, I could care less about stats, I never eve look at mine, my post today is about blogging too, we must be all thinking alike right now, lol!!!

  3. Laura, I so agree! I took off my Google connect app since I didn't like the numbers game it promoted. I now just blog what I want and enjoy the friends I have made, like you! Hugs!

  4. it is important to blog about what lights your fire - not trying to blog to an audience. and hopefully your fire connects to others.

  5. Excellent post! I have always considered my blog an online diary and I have never varied from that in my 8 plus years of blogging.

  6. Hey Laura, what you have written is so true...and it does feel competitive at times, I have no idea how they can do it, or keep it up. I think every blogger has to go through some stages to find out where they fit in, thank goodness we don't have to fight to be on the top. I will never be blogging with the big girls, and that's fine with me, made my peace with that years ago...even wrote about it, lol.

    The kind of blogs that I follow, and read are mostly just that, "kind" those that will lend a helping hand, understand, and are friends...
    and I wouldn't have it any other way. I like the bloggers I hang out with, I know that they are all genuine, and real, learning, and sharing, real is good...real good.

    I think as we blog along we realize what is important to us, for some it's still going to be being the best, that's fine, for others it's about relationships, friendships, learning, and improving ourselves. That's fine too...the most important thing is to do what is real for you.

    Your blog has evolved into this wonderfully articulate and helpful space where you share life, and inspire us, and that's the highest compliment I can give to a blogger.


  7. I love what you wrote. I love your blog. I love the blogs that are not so commercial but personal. I love people so much and just the friendship and you get to know and love your new friends. I love this post. I agree on the blog voice . I decided when I started my blog that I would write what I thought . Some days about furniture or resale or GOD. I think my header says God Family friends sort of thing. My journey is for peace and to talk about GOD when I want and friends and family and the furniture i sale or paint etc. I love your blog so much and feel very blessed to be a follower. ..WELL SAID

  8. Great post Laura! I am not competitive. I blog to share my photos and hope others will like them I used to make them into scrap books and always said that when I'm old(er) I would sit in my rocking chair and remember the good times I had taking them. Now with the blog I can sit in my rocking chair with my lap top and enjoy them along with the comments others make.

  9. Great post firned! Thanks for sharing and I completly agree with you. I just keep writing and write what I want to write, and what in my heart. I can't be others :)

  10. Your blogging philosophy is very similar to mine. I blog about what I enjoy and share my projects when I have time to make any. I'm also on a budget and limited on what I can spend. I prefer blogs, like yours, that write about everyday life and share simple pleasures. I don't consider myself in a competition because I can't compete with the big bloggers. I don't have that many things or feel the need to constantly rearrange things in my home. I love visiting them though and joining their parties when I can. My blog is still evolving and I'm trying to grow a little bit at a time. I think blogging is all about being true to yourself and hopefully the rest will fall into place. Thanks for the lovely post!

  11. We all just have to be our own person in life, and in blogland too I guess.

  12. I agree with you. I am competitive in some areas of my life, but not all areas. I try to write what I am excited about and hope that others are drawn to that too. I try not to write about things just to have something to post. The blogs that I'm least interested in are the ones that are constantly having parties. It seems like overkill! I join my sister's linky party most weeks, but that's about it. I do get a lot of good traffic from her blog too, so I believe it is a good traffic source for my blog. I do want a lot of readers because otherwise I'm just writing to the wind! But.......I want people to like my blog and not feel obligated to follow it either. So, I share that opinion with you. I enjoy reading your blog because it is different from some others. I like that yours is more of a therapeutic blog with feelings and emotions. I've always been interested in psychology and love talking about it. One thing I read early on when I started bloggging is to make sure you use your own style and not let someone else dictate how you should be doing it. Otherwise, people can see through that. It will sound phony. I don't want people to think I'm perfect (which I'm not) or a horrible mess (which I am sometimes). LOL! So, I treat my blog like I'm sharing things with a bunch of friends. Like I'm having you over at my house and I'm showing you something I did or that I'm excited about or even sad about. That's my style and I'm sticking with it.

  13. I'm with you, Laura. I write what I love and I write to please myself first and foremost. There is no way I could compete with many of these savvy bloggers that can do it all...or seem to anyway. I never try to do something better than someone else nor do I care if someone else is way ahead of me in some areas. I love my blog but I love my family more and if it came to a choice---well, there wouldn't be one. I DO credit BLOGGING with saving my grandson's life this past November. I may be blogging for no other reason in the world that to be a link that would save him. Thank God for Kristin that posted about her son's "mystery" illness and to Lauren that saw that post and related it to what we were going through. The doctors were stumped and we were losing our little boy....and there you have it- blogging!

    I think that is one reason I don't do the linky thing either. I don't want to have to judge whether one project is better than another. It would break my heart to know someone poured hours of time and talent into a project and then no one viewed/liked it.

    As for stats- I have no idea what mine are. Should I check? nah.....xo Diana

  14. Oh Laura, Thank you so much for writing this! Diana, will tell you this is where I have been today. Sometimes it feels like a competition thing. I was about to give up today-more because I didn't feel a connection. This was just what I needed.


  15. Good for you Laura! Let those that feel the need to compete do so.. It's likely they are competitive in other areas of their lives too. It gets old doesn't it? I think people blog for different reasons. Some want to sell something .. or perhaps they think they can become famous writers?? Most bloggers make no money and those that are around for a long time seem to be okay with just connecting with others and sharing.. that's what it's about.

    Hope your week is going well! xxleslie

  16. Laura,
    I thought that post was very interesting. A friend emailed me earlier in the week and asked me how to have a successful blog. I had to answer that I had no idea. I'm not in the competing "squad". I'm just documenting what's happening at The Little White House, finding friends and having fun along the way!

  17. Great post Laura, and accurate!


  18. Great post, Laura. I checked my stats in the beginning, too. I haven't checked them in ages. I don't care how many followers I have. I do care that I have made friendships and connections to others that I never would have known outside the blog world. There are so many wise women here that are still learning and growing as we age, myself included. Sharing our stories and worries and the things we love about life is what keeps me here.

  19. I think all that positioning stuff is counter productive to an authentic voice. I know authenticity is what I look for in a blog. Yours is one of the best.


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