F Simple and Serene Living: are you living your dream 09 10
Wednesday, March 27, 2013

are you living your dream

Are you living your dream? Do you wake up each day and say this is it, this is where I am supposed to be? Do you stop in the middle of the day and think I love this moment?



Or, are you questioning this moment in your life?

As women, we often try to live up to the expectations of others. There seem to be so many "shoulds" in our lives. 

I have been talking to several women in my age range recently and realize that there are many of us who are feeling frustrated by life's circumstances. We are divorced or widowed. We were stay at home moms for much of our adult lives and have been left without the means to support ourselves adequately. 



We were caught between a generation of older women who primarily stayed at home and were provided for, and a generation of younger women who were taught to value and take care of themselves. 

We were the young women who were metaphorically or actually burning our bras, while at the same time our parents were encouraging us to go to college and find a husband to support us. 

We are women who still feel that we have a lot to contribute, and yet we are unable to find jobs in a poor economy and in an atmosphere of revering younger workers. 



We are happy with who we are, but we are unhappy with our circumstances. 

So do you believe that you should go out and look for your life's purpose, or do you think you should stop, love the moment you are living in and let that purpose come to you?

What do you think?



 

21 comments:

  1. What do I think?? I couldn't be farther off the road I wanted to be on if I tried! Why? What does it all mean? If I ever find out, you'll be the first to know! Life can really be a mystery!

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  2. Hi,
    I am of that generation too. Have a home, have a career, raise your children. It was all very stressful. When I was first married I did not feel as though I had a right to spend money that my husband earned. If I did I always asked "permission" I did not value my contrubition to our marriage. Housekeeping had no value! We had babies and I felt even less valued. I stayed at home with them because I felt that they needed me, but my inner voice kept telling me what I was doing was not nearly as important as having a "career". I finally got the career and now I had two major jobs, it was all so tiring. I am going to leave my "career" at the end of this school year. It is called retirement but I am going to call it the"rest of my life". I am going to be happy in each moment and not worry about what others think.
    Suzan
    Ladybug cottage

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  3. Sometimes I feel as if I'm between a rock and a hard place. Not sure what the answer is.

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  4. Hi there Laura ! thankyou for coming to my blog (via diana) and appreciate your comments! LOVE this post!!! its funny because only in the past three months have i actually started to love my life and feel as tho i have found my purpose! I am not sure if its right to go looking for it, or wait for it to come to you... I feel as though i had been looking in all the wrong places for so long and all of a sudden, everything is falling into place for me and i feel so happy. I did have to do a bit of soul searching recently and a book called "the magic" really has helped me (so i believe)! It was asking the universe(or for spiritual guidance) for my purpose and being grateful for what I was doing at the time (even though i hated it!) But at the end of the day, i feel like there is some kind of plan for everyone and things go the way they are supposed to... Hope that you are in a happy place! thanks again for stopping by my blog!
    laura x

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  5. I too am of that generation and I find if I don't enjoy the moment it leaves me to be depressed about it-I subscribe to the one foot in front of the other, even if it's baby steps.
    Have a wonderful Easter.

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  6. Laura, so perfectly put, I am of that generation, but still not of that generation...it's like breaking free of the bonds of childhood expectations, and fear of what the future will bring.

    I am starting to believe that some of us find our lives purpose in bits and pieces...some find it with a bang, and some blindly swat it away.

    It's all relative, and depends on how you see life.

    Right now I am living most of my dream, a bit of it is out of focus...lol. It will happen.

    Jen

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  7. Laura you know this is my life also. I'm officially retired but my SS income is so low because most of my life I stayed home and took care of kids. I did work for several years but the amount of money I earned was nowhere near enough to provide for me in my retirement. I survive by living frugally and sharing my home with a housemate. It's not easy nor fun but I am making the best of it.
    hugs,
    Linda

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  8. I think that regret simply makes us unhappy and wastes our time, for there's nothing we can do about decisions we made in the past. BTW, in many cases the younger women are giving up a lot to chase a career, and I don't know if it's worth the sacrifices they're making either. There are pros and cons to both. I think that looking for the best you can in the circumstances you're in is the way to go, for we never know what life will bring us. And, I think it's always important to be pursuing a goal, even if that goal changes.

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  9. Great post today, Laura. I am in the midst of making some real changes in my life- taking some steps I have been struggling to WANT to take. I do think we have to grab opportunities that come along-lest they don't come our way again. I will let you know how my journey is going soon- I know YOU are making some life altering changes, too, and I will say a prayer that it works out for you- xo Diana

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  10. Hi my sweet new friend.. Found you on one of my friends blogs.. Glad that I popped on over.. I have the blog The Rusty Pearl.. WOULD love for you to follow too.. I must say YOUR blog is just awesome. Love your header and your posts... I think you hit the nail on the head with this post. I am 45 and I don't think I am living to my full capacity LOL right now.. I think as moms we tend to take ourselves off the LIST .. I have one more child still at home she is a freshman and when she is off to college she will the last to FLY the coop so to speak and I will be full EMPTY NESTER then .. SO I have been reading and finding things that give me joy making friends, getting hobbies blogging and NOW have a small business WHICH I love . THE RUSTY PEARL and looking to get back into the workforce too. I have dedicated FRIDAYS TO MY DAY FRIDAYS LOL.. trying to get myself back on that LIST GIRL .... SO I am not waiting for it all to come to me.. I am going to go out and JUST GET it ... HUGS and so happy GOD has crossed our paths ... HUGS

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  11. Great post! Interesting comments. I have been questioning and thinking on this subject for a couple of years now. I believe that we have many Life purposes, to be fulfilled at different stages of our lives. When I quit working full time to become an at home mom caring for my children, I knew absolutely that I was doing what I needed to do. It seems that I am now questioning myself on whether I should have been a stay at home mom. Well it's about thirty years too late to question my decision now! I think it is just a case of "the grass is always greener on the other side". I have been a literacy volunteer and tutor for 17 years now. It seems that it is another one of my Life's purposes. My regrets about the Life purposes that I seemed to have, are that they did/do not create monetary wealth for a nest egg in my older years. It was eye opening to read other women's comments and see that I am not the only one feeling this way at this stage in life.

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  12. Interesting post and lots to ponder. I'm always try to do interesting things that make me happy. It would just be nice it I could make a living off of any of it. And maybe that's my problem - money shouldn't be the measure of my happiness, should it? It's the things I do and the people I surround myself with who should make me happy. Unfortunately, we need money in order to live. Grrr.... It's a catch 22 isn't it?

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  13. I say get out onto that road and find your bliss! After many years of working in a job that paid me well but that drained my emotions and my energy every single day (I was a critical care nurse), I retired at my earliest opportunity. Despite the financial hit, I have never been happier. I make my crafts, sell the odd one online and am thankful for each and every day. As they say, we only have one life to live.

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  14. Laura, Great post. For the first 50 years of my life I kept searching and KNEW I was not doing what I was intended to do. Fortunately I excelled at different jobs and then would get bored. At age 50 I did a study group with other women on the book The Artist's Way. About half way through the book there was a question that asked what I saw myself doing when I am 80. The answer rolled out of my mouth. In several months I was enrolled in the school to accomplish my desire and everything since then has fallen into place. Now 16 years later I am confident I am doing what I am intended to do and still following my passions. Intuition has always been strong in me. I believe this is a "voice" from God/Universe. I am still learning and cherish every day and do not feel like I am searching like my first 50 years. Life has not always been easy for me, however, like the song says, I did it my way. That has not always been the popular way, however, it has been true to my soul's desires. Cherish each day; each moment. From what I have discovered for my life are two keys: honesty and gratitude. Peace and Blessings!

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  15. I believe in evaluating our lives all along the way. I'm always trying to figure out if my life is on course and what I can do different to live my dream. I pray about it and ask God to help me live my life as He sees fit. We have to make adjustments to stay on course. Life throws us off course...regularly. It's always a challenge! Sweet hugs, Diane

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  16. I believe that I'm where I'm supposed to be right now. That doesn't mean it's where I'll be forever though. Times changes and therefore we have change with them. So far, life has handed me what I need, hopefully it will continue. If I hit a bump in the road then I guess it is God's way of telling me I need to re-evaluate my choices.

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  17. Once again, Laura, you have put into words what I have been feeling all year: We are happy with who we are, but we are unhappy with our circumstances.

    I've abandoned hope of finding a job with benefits (almost 60). Part of my life's purpose is complete---my kids have turned out well despite my less than perfect parenting. I'm more into trying to love the moment even in tough circumstances. I keep a gratitude journal to try to help me focus on something positive each day.

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  18. Your post was very well written. And the comments were also very intersting to read. My life went a very different path, but in the end, the question "am I where I want to be or where I should be in my life?" is a haunting one as well. I'm trying to remember that whatever I did in the past, it lead me where I am today and I should make the best of it... Not that I'm leaving a dream every minute, but most of the time, if I take a moment to think about it, I realise I'm a happy lucky girl!

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  19. I love this post. My life turned out odd too me and here is why.....I got married to a wonderful man that I so love 25 years later and I thought we would have children but I got my MS and then I learned to live with it. Many years later we were blessed with our two puppies and I figure I am a mommy anyway. It took a weird turn but I am so lucky in a way, it made me stronger then I ever thought possible and made me cherish every moment in life.

    Cynthia

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  20. I have a good life -- a good husband, two young adult children of whom I am proud, a decent house, etc. -- and I still feel somehow unfulfilled. I don't know what I expected my life to be exactly, but I can't help feeling I should have done and should be doing more. Living my dream? If only I knew what that was!

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  21. Laura, firstly let me say, I don't know how I have missed your post, somehow you were not transferred over when I switched to Bloglovin', so I have missed many of your posts... I just thought you were still not posting yet, my apologies.... I have just gone back and am reading all the posts I missed, and wanted to comment here and say for me, this is a combination of both, I believe in living in the moment and enjoying every single second of it, however, I also believe if you have dreams or feel there is something you might like to try then go for it... sometimes we do not know our purpose until we stumble upon it! I'm off to read more posts (and I've added you to my reading list)! Cheers~

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